An Excerpt from the
“The Care and Keeping Of A Shan”
by Kenny Down
My wife Shannon (“ The Shan”) loves being served coffee in bed in the morning. I nicknamed my wife “The Shan” early on in our relationship. How I care for her and her needs, and how I do those things to honor and protect our relationship (The keeping of a Shan) helps keep our relationship strong, joyful and fun. Our morning coffee routine truly is a key component to her happiness and mine every morning…
It is very important to find out how Shan likes her morning coffee. A Shan can be very picky about her morning coffee and getting this one right assures your day with a Shan is off to a good start.
My Shan likes her coffee in a standard cup, not a car cup or a traveler mug. A normal old-fashioned coffee cup is the only thing that will satisfy a waking Shan. A Shan will sometimes send you away if you show up in the bedroom with the wrong container.
A Shan likes her coffee with a tiny bit of fat free half and half (they actually make such a thing,) along with three-quarters of a package of “Splenda.” You will need to put the cream and sweetener in the cup before pouring in the coffee to assure a good mixture. Also stir with a spoon just before serving. The coffee must be hot, but not too hot. Running hot water on the cup to pre-warm it before adding the coffee is a touch that does not go unrewarded.
My Shan’s grandfather would bring his wife coffee every morning. My wife told me this story early on in our relationship. Listening closely to a Shan and learning when a story is really for “instructional purposes” is very important. When a Shan is telling you a story listen carefully, there may be more than just a story being told.
I have a nice set of sweats I like to wear to be comfortable around the house. My wife told me a story of her mother and her mother’s second ex-husband who wore a one-piece jumper style overall every day ─ she left him, so the story goes. This was not just a story my wife was telling me; this was an instruction not to start and end the day in my sweats. A Shan believes once you start wearing the “all day sweat” look, you have given up. Dress up often; try to look your best. A Shan spends much time dressing up and taking care of herself to impress you, doing the same assures that a Shan understands that she is important to you.
Finding out how your Shan likes her coffee and adhering strictly to her instructions will score big points. Knowing the Shan’s beliefs and listening to all her stories will score even bigger.
This is an excerpt from the “The Care and Keeping Of A Shan.” It’s a book written about by Kenny about his care for Shan, her needs, and how he does those things to honor and protect their relationship. In this book, he shares certain relationship methods he developed, and many rules he was made aware of —these guidelines should roughly fit your relationship. Kenny hopes and encourages you to begin keeping your own guidance manual, if even just mentally — the rewards of doing so for your relationship are great.